Fortunately, his attorney is Robert Blarney

I'm always charmed by people whose names undermine their goals, like the murder defendant named Butcher.

Add one to the files. A fellow stabbed his cheerleader ex-girlfriend 16 times (then botched slashing his own throat), and his defense at the murder trial is that his acne medication made him do it.

Maybe, maybe not. But does it help that his name is John Mullarkey?

(J/k re: the attorney, one Robert Stewart.)